Saturday, November 28, 2009

Dashboard Confessions Pt II

Now here's my take on it years later, lol

Never felt this way before
Never wanted anything more
Want to tear the doors down
And let her in on all my secrets
Want to let her see under my skin
Let her wear the clothes I’ve been in
Let her spend time in my mind
In the darkest corners that reside within
But my fear is what she would see
And how she would receive
The man inside, she has never seen
Would he repel her and make her flee
Then the voices inside speak to me
‘What’s there to tell that she will not see?
If you love her so then don’t let her know
It’s best for you to her show’
So on a clear blue night with the summer breeze
I ask her out to come and meet me
She arrived not a bit too early
Called out my name, me being in the basement
I asked her to come down and so she did
To find me knife in hand, blood on fist
With a stiff on the floor carved to bits
‘This is who I am, I can’t fake it
Thought you should know so asked you here to see it
But before you say or do a thing
I need you to know I love you more than anything
Or anyone I’ve ever known
And if you need me to let this go
You’re the only one that can make it so’
She looked into my eyes to see
The savage desire that lay within me
Tears rolling down her face
She could take no more so turned away
I couldn’t take it, this was a mistake
And destroyed the only person I ever loved in my wake
I moved to her slowly and turned her round
Told her I loved her and apologized for letting her down
I’d understand whatever action she’d take
Whatever happened now, the consequences I’d face
With tears and sobs she slipped the knife from my hands
And very slowly turned around
‘It’s alright baby’ was all she said
As she placed the knife quite skillfully into my chest
And with one swift blow she slit my throat
As her savage laugh gargled from to meet my ears
It suddenly became clear, only evil can love the evil men do
As the voices whispered ‘you fell in love with someone just like you’

Dashboard confessions

Nostaligia, here's something I wrote a long long time ago. A bit edited though. Wanted to see how much I've grown.

Oh no, this wasn't my fault
I'm wanted for murder again
I met her on Friday
I told her my history
She told me she thought it was sexy
And that if she kissed me
She surely would want to see me again
She called on a Sunday
And said that she missed me
Would I be her dear special friend?
I thought it romantic
No need for panic
She said we'll be dinning real late
She took me to the kitchen
Where all the knives lay unhidden
The voices start calling
Their thoughts not so appalling
I'm wanted for murder again

Oh no, this wasn't my fault
I'm wanted for murder again
Was a dry day in December
One I swear I'd remember
It would make week since we met
And to my surprise
Things were still wild
I felt I’ll be keeping this friend
To mark this fair date
We would meet at the dock by a crate
But here I was late
Could this all be fate?
I caught her with another man
She was holding his hand
Laughing and smiling
The voices come calling again
And before she could explain
And introduce me to her father by name
I'm wanted for murder again

Oh no, this wasn't my fault
I'm wanted for murder again
Just when I'm off women
She came up beside me
She just wanted to be a friend
The voices were okay
They thought this was healthy
So we decided to let her to stay
Few months we're still friendly
And it was getting real trendy
I decided to let her inside
Told her all my secrets
The voices upheld it
I thought it went all very well
But then she called in for backup
And brought out the handcuffs
Oh why did she want it to end
The voices start screaming
As they watch the blood streaming
Now people are dying again
Shit! I'm wanted for murder again!!!!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Things unsaid

I never told you I love you
Even though it was always on my mind
I let you go to easy
I never showed you, you’re worth the fight
And everyday I’ve wasted
Since the day you’ve been gone
Is another day I regret
The things left unsaid
And even though you’ve moved on
And another man tasted
I don’t mean to rock the boat
That’s already sailed
I just need to get this off my chest
So I’ll say this now
For every time I didn’t
And for ever tear I caused you and myself
With my broken heart
And the soul I wasted
I loved you then, now and ever
with all the moments we coulda, shoulda, woulda and did share

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Questions and Answers

She left me asking why
Why did she have to leave?
Why didn’t she want me?
Why couldn’t I stop her?
Why didn’t I have the right words?
Why can’t I just let her be?
Why can’t I let go?
Why does the thought of her hurt so bad?
Why do I want her back so bad?
Why can’t I get to sleep?
Why can’t I just move on?
Why was it so easy for her?
Why do I hate her in the mornings and yet miss her every night?
Why don’t I have the answers to these questions?
Or is the reason simply, there are just some questions deep inside I really don’t want to find the answers to.

Interesting Times

There’s an old Chinese curse that goes; 'may you live in interesting times', now that struck me as funny when I first heard it. That’s because I consider that I don't just live in interesting times, I live amongst interesting people as well. Case in point an experience I had not so long ago. You see a friend comes round to my place to supposedly say hello. Now I’ve known this guy for not too long but for that amount of time I’d say we’re pretty close. Anyways he comes into my house, takes a seat with his hands in his jacket, turns right to me and looks me dead in the eye. Then he proceeds to give me the most interesting factual speech I suspect I will ever hear, it goes like this

‘I’m sorry to bug you man, I really mean that, I know you got your own problems and shit but look man I’m broke. Dead broke, I don’t even have a dime to buy myself lunch; I had no illusions of breakfast. Now I can stick this out, least I think I can but the thing is now my mum’s now in the hospital in need of an operation and I can’t bloody afford it. I’m the only family she has and that woman has been good to me man, hell she’s been good to you; she’s been good to everyone. She’s a freaking saint and you know it. So I have to do something, you get that; I mean I am pretty desperate at this point.

Now it occurs to me that I have just two choices, either I take a loan from somewhere or someone or I gotta rob someone. Dude, I don’t own anything I can use as quadrilateral, I mean no house, no car, hell I don’t even own the bed I sleep on, so the banks are out for sure. I just lost my job and you know how that went so that options out. My savings have gone into paying back the company for that little incident. So it’s down to robbing, sadly.

Dude, you’re the one person I trust and can always turn to and you know what they say man, you rob the people you know first! So I just thought before I pull this gun out of my jacket and go all crazy up in here, I’d just try asking you nicely first... Can you loan me $3000?’
Now think about it, what could I say to that? I mean, even if I didn’t have the money he had laid down a pretty convincing plea and he did ask, ever so nicely...first!